This morning has been rough. I'm frustrated. I'm hurting. I'm scared. Most of all, I'm ANGRY.
Saturday, one of our students took her own life. She had been struggling with online school and was coming back to in-person instruction. She was a beautiful girl - huge smile, big personality, great volleyball player, headed to college in California. By all outward appearances, she was doing great. Most people had no idea there was any chance this could happen. A few DID know. They were trying to get help to her. Now they are left thinking about how it was too little too late.
A couple of weeks ago I told my coteacher that I was afraid we were going to see a string of suicides, and soon. Our students and teachers (parents too) are hurting, feeling isolated and alone, feeling overwhelmed, and are talking about giving up. I have had to make more referrals to the school counselors about what the kids are saying in emails and in classes in the past 2 months than I have in my 16 years of teaching. It's bad. It's really bad.
I told our administrators our kids, especially the online ones, were struggling. I told them how they were overwhelmed with the volume of work, the lack of communication and the drastic changes. I told them how our in-person kids are still feeling isolated, even in a room full of their peers. I feel like my words and warnings fell on deaf ears.
I went to Facebook and posted in parent groups and on my page - TALK TO YOUR KIDS. They are hurting. They are struggling. Please hear them.
This morning, as someone talked about what a tragedy this was, I just wanted to stand up and shout, 'YES - one that COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED!!!!" The longer I sat there listening to what we were and were not allowed to say or talk about with our students, the angrier I became. LET THEM TALK. HEAR THEM. Don't hush things. Don't hide things. Talk about it. Let them see the tears. Let them see you are hurting and struggling too. Take a step back from the academics and workload and just spend time with the students. They are trying to talk to you. They are trying to tell you how they feel. Are you listening? Are you really hearing them out?
Do I know that Elise would still be here if anyone had done something sooner or if things had been handled differently? No. Could it truly have been avoided? I don't know. What I do know is this - unless we do something and do it soon, we are going to lose more students. We have to find a way to reach them before that happens.
Just be there for kids. Hug them. Hold their hand. Listen to them. Truly HEAR THEM.
