Please just carry me...

Yesterday both boys had to stay home from school again because they were sick. Again. One had a 104.4 fever at one point and the other got as high as 103.7. Never a fun thing for a mom. Both came out to the couch and were laying there watching TV for a while. Emma, of course, couldn't figure out what was going on and kept trying to get their attention. Finally, she came over to me and "climbed" up me like a little monkey. She just wanted to be held. Fine with me. We sat rocking for a while until she got bored of that and went to play again. Both boys had fallen asleep on the couch and she decided to climb on them. Patrick didn't take too kindly to being wakened with a foot on his face. So I told the boys to move back into their room to sleep so Emma wouldn't keep climbing all over them. Patrick looked at me and said, "I don't think I can walk. Will you carry me?" I don't know when my teeny tiny boy turned into a tall, heavy, 6 year-old, but I still was able to comply. I then carried Daniel to bed and both boys slept the morning away. Emma wasn't far behind them to take her nap too.

Later, Emma called for me to come & get her. Normally I can pick her up out of her crib and put her down, and she'll just take off running. Not yesterday. I put her down and she held up her little arms and began opening & closing her little fists for me to pick her up. So I picked her up and carried her back to the rocker. We sat and cuddled for a while until the boys got up.

The three of them alternated between watching TV, reading a book and sleeping for the rest of the day. Each time the Motrin wore off and the fever came back, the boys wanted more of Mommy's TLC. Each time the boys slept, Emma demanded more cuddles and attention. I really didn't mind any of it. I enjoyed the extra snuggles with my way-too-quickly-growing children. I just really didn't like seeing my boys suffer with being sick.

Just before their normal bedtime, both boys were ready to sleep again - this time for the night. We got the Motrin in them and washed them off. As I said "OK - off to bed" Daniel looked up at me and said "Will you please just carry me?" Once again I found myself carrying a sick child down the hall to his bed. This time, though, I had the thought, "Who's going to carry ME? I am so tired and so worn and so weary and so... wait! Someone IS carrying me! God has been carrying me up this mountain for weeks now. Otherwise I'd still be in a heap at the bottom of the mountain looking up towards the peak saying 'I can't, I can't'."

As I felt the reassurance of His tender love and care washing over me again, I sensed another tug at my heart. Pictures of a little boy in South Dakota flooded my mind. I wondered if he was being held and carried anymore, and determined it was past time for a phone call to check in on my little buddy. I thought about a young preteen girl I've counseled, and the struggles she's going through. I wondered if she was still feeling held and carried through the storm. Images of some little children displaced by the recent months of tornadoes across the country rushed in. I prayed that they would feel sheltered in His arms, though their earthly shelter and all of their possessions were gone. I longed to be in 10 places at once, so I could give each kid I was thinking of a great big hug and reassure them that it was going to be ok. SO much hurt right now in so many young lives. So much pain... so much suffering... and I could only be here, helping the kiddos closest to me through their current hurt. I couldn't be everywhere, but I knew Someone who could. Thousands of aching hearts, but One Savior who can carry us all. One Savior who can wrap His arms around each and every one of us at the same time. One Savior who can fully consume each and every one of our hearts, minds and souls... if we'll just allow Him.

The heart-wrenching images flashing through my mind became replaced with images of Christ holding each child close to Him, easing the hurts with a peace and comfort that only He can provide. I went to bed reassured that all was right... because God is still on the throne and He still reigns. I will do my part and reach out and encourage those I can. I will even stretch myself to reach further than I thought I could. If I can't go I will help support those who can. But, no matter what, I will rest in the knowledge that even if I can't reach someone... He can.

Lord Jesus, please keep carrying us up these mountains and through these valleys. Let us rest in the comfort of the shelter of Your arms and trust that You are still greater than all that is in or of this world. Help us reach out to those who don't feel Your presence, and allow us to be a light for You, comforting them and encouraging them. Lord, please, just carry us all.